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By that I mean, ditch your expectations of what any one date or encounter might lead to. That kind of neurotic focus on end results was bad enough before you became a parent. Now that you are one, you have love in your life already: your children. You're not desperate. Knowing that frees you to live in the moment and take things as they come, and as everyone knows, the minute you relax and go with the flow, people find you more desirable.