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Its an uphill battle I should have given up long back.think I have realised the signs and shud have seen them. If anyone's still struggling to let go of them then don't wait do it now.Let go of them if .

- they have dumped you

- they have moved on to some one else

- they have done zero or minimal contact since break up

- they contact - back away and then contact again

- they never miss the sex with you or lose physical attraction

- birthdays, anniersaries and festivals dont mean nothing to them

- they haven't talked about you with friends or tried to find out how you doin

- they never respond to your texts or calls


If any of the above is happening with you..it's time to LET GO and realise its OVER!

That one always happens, so it's not really a sign you won't get back together

I didn't want to say.

The rest of what tushboy wrote are good points though. The first two are the least of the evils though. The rest are baaaad signs.

These are some of the hardest things to accept. I know first hand. But it sends a clear message and there will be no confusing signs. they simply do not want you back. Of course we still ask ourselves "why", but what is the point. You'll never know. I prefer this way over trying to analyze e-mails or 4 a.m. text messages.

I'd have to agree. Over-analyzing every little thing that you can't control (i.e. your ex) just delays the healing/learning process. Like Kelebek said, you stay miserable if you don't truly let go.

Absoloutley. I think this is good advice. I've made an idiot out of myself in my time holding out hope for a guy stringing me along with "maybe we will get back together maybe we wont" and then when he backed off i was still after him. I realise NC Is probably the best invention ever to stop humiliation and further heartbreak!

But we are all on the "getting back together" forum...so isn't clear that none of us has truly let go? how can you if you still have hopes for reconciliation?

If you truly loved someone you would naturally always hope to get back together. But you must move on and let go! Once you do that you open up the doors to many possibilities. But you must let go to have a chance at getting them back. Letting go means letting go not giving up hope. You gotta let them go free and find what they want and show them you respect them and yourself enough to let them leave. It also means letting go of those feelings that you currently have for them so you can think with a clear and objective mind as best as possible. you need to find out if they are truly the ONE for you... Hope for reconciliation is just what it is and as time moves on it diminishes especially once you meet someone new.

How do you let go if they won't let you. If they see that you have not been in contact with them so they contact you to keep you on a string. I guess the obvious answer is strict NC.

First of all folks the overanalyzation needs to stop NOW! They broke up with you, and if you don't know why then you weren't paying attention, listening, or the communication in your relationship was terrible to begin with, and that is ALWAYS a relationship killer, so if you don't know then there is NO WAY your getting them back. However if you do know why then there is always a chance in getting them back if change is an option!! But like everyone says you need to be ready for rejection before you can actually find out if it's in the cards or not. But what is NOT going to help is this over analyzation of the situation. It is what it is and you need to learn from it and move on, and if that means making the necessary changes then great and good luck!! If it means finding someone new then once again great and good luck! But for god's sake if you don't have any idea what is going on or if there's a chance then you don't stand a chance. You are the one who was in the relationship and if you don't know your ex well enough than it was doomed from the get go.