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Hi all,

I need some advice. For backgroun to my story see


Essentially here are the details. After almost 2 years together my boyfriend broke up with me because he wasn't sure if he loves me in the right way and doesn't know if I am the one, even though he wants me to be and says I am perfect for him. That was 2 months ago, and since then we have talked about once a week and seen each other about 6 times. Most of the contact was initiated by me, but he called a few times as well.

I started to think this was really over when last night he called and we talked as if there was no problems between us at all. Just lots of catching up I made sure to act very happy and busy and wasn't at all emotional. We talked about maybe getting together tonight but he is at meetings out of town and doesn't know when he'll be back, then he leaves again tomorrow for work trips.

At this point I can't help but get my hopes up, but I keep telling myself this means nothing. Part of me wants to call him and just say that since we are both clearly not with anyone else and still very much like each other and are very attracted to each other, what is the harm in trying to be together again for a few months to see how things go. The other part of me says to just back off and let him keep calling. But I don't want this to go on forever and have us 6 months down the line still in this limbo phase.

any thoughts?

I honestly believe he is a good guy who isn't playing me, he just really doesn't know how he feels. he isn't dating, and he said this wasn't about finding someone else better for him.

I would say do a little pulling away and get him to chase a little further. I wouldn't meet up tonight. I wouldn't be too available to him right now. But I'd like to see what others say as I am not there right now in my situation.

Go slow don't rush make him come to you!

I wish I were so lucky!

You are doing most of the calling now he called you to suggest possibly getting together tonight but left it very vague because he is travelling. He still sounds very wishy washy. If he can't make solid plans and has one foot in and one foot out then I would suggest you kick his other foot out of your life until he is ready to jump back in with both feet and his entire self heart mind and soul. I think you need to stop contacting him. Let him go after you, let him call you, let him make solid plans with you, not wishy washy, work is so busy, maybe yes, maybe no plans. You deserve someone who truly wants to be with you, not someone who can't make up his mind.